03 January 2007

Liar

The past month has brought with it not only tidings of comfort and joy, but also many germs and bugs and trips to various doctor's offices. We've all been on two rounds of different anti-biotics and symptomatic relievers. Yesterday I made yet another journey to the doctor and passed my time flipping through some magazines. I came across a "quiz" in one of them--"What does your nightstand say about you". I scanned it--I always find the quizzes amusing and worry that there may actually be people out there that take them to heart.

That evening when I finally made my way up to my bedroom and flipped on my light, my eyes went right to my bedstand, and I had to start laughing. It seemed to be screaming: "You haven't had sex in a very long time, and you may never again".

Contents of aforementioned stand:

My lamp
An appalling pile of wadded up tissues (completely inexcusable, I know)
Vicks Vapo Rub
Nasal Spray
Empty bottle of Tylenol
Wooden cigar box holding various fingernail utilities (file, polish, bobby pin?)
Children's Motrin
Picture of the A's
The Poetry and Short Works of Dorothy Parker (died alone, with her dog)
Bridget Jones Diary (dog-eared pages, possible margarita stains)
Study Bible
Vanity Fair magazine

Definitely not in the "Sexy Susan" category. I put away the meds and tossed the tissues; this morning I even put the books in my bookcase in my room. I figured I could use the exercise when I got out of bed tonight to retrieve them.

8 comments:

Lauren said...

That is too funny. Mine is a wreck too.

Emptyman said...

Does the quiz only work for women? Because I'm curious:

Lamp with hand-painted shade (my one and only craft project).

Box of tissues.

Half-read copy of "Swann's Way," the first volume of Proust's "In Search Of Lost Time" (book club assignment.)

Half a bottle of water (to thwart hangovers).

My great-grandfather's pocketwatch (because I can't see the clock radio across the room without my contacts.)

Inside the drawer: the, um, typical things you would find inside the drawer of a bachelor's nightstand.

mamalang said...

Mine is covered with books, a lamp that isn't even plugged in, and who knows what other crap my kids have thrown on there...lol.

Hope you are all feeling better soon!

And thanks for the comment, going over to check out the site now!

B. said...

Ok, I'll play:

Two baby monitors, one broken, one barely working.

One forehead thermometer.

Asthma medication.

Foot cream.

A picture of me and hubby when I was MUCH thinner.

Lamp.

What I don't have is an alarm clock, because my built in versions work impeccably -- even when I put them to bed late.

Yawn. That list is so boring, I almost fell asleep writing it!

BECC said...

I love it!!

R

Girl con Queso said...

You make me laugh. Mine has six, count them, six books that I'm not reading because I'm always on the freaking computer. Sigh. I hope you guys feel better soon!

Jenn said...

Becc. Very nice. You're lounging around, planning your wedding and staring at your ring finger, and leave me three words and don't even update your blog? Woman, I hardly know thee. (And don't whine about the fact that you're moving and all that jazz. love ya.)

BECC said...

If I could pass all of my happiness onto you, you know I would. I am completely blessed to have found this intense love twice in a lifetime. And you will hear no whining here! I have a moving company coming in! Remember? I love you too!!! LOL