Dear Chrysler

Dear Chrysler,

Creator of the Pa-Crapica, we need to chat.

Surely you cannot be serious when you have various technicians tell me that it is perfectly normal for my car to need two to three quarts of oil added to it between oil changes.

Surely, you cannot.

You should note that they can barely keep a straight face and may want to invest some cash into acting lessons for them.

It's fabulous that in order to speak to someone, you must sit on hold and be transferred eight times. Luckily for me, I have unlimited minutes and a three hour commute a few days a week, and am always looking for new ways to kill time.

I want to meet you so that I can personally remove your toenails with a dull knife after being forced to listen to the likes of Celine Dion, Michael Bolton and Gloria Estfan while holding. Die in a fire, please.

Anyhoo, just wanted you to know that after being told by two people that, yes, that was an acceptable rate of oil burn according to you and additionally I was calling the wrong "800" number, and that I had to call another and speak to someone else, because what did I expect the customer service number to do? Provide customer service? Was I high? Anyway, lost my train of thought after you then refused to give me the 800 number to the Chrysler Service Contract Division.

Oh yes.

In anticipation of your continued suck-tastic service, I've reserved a new blog name.

It's titled "Chrysler Sucks". You can find it at http://chryslerpacificasucks.blogspot.com/.

I'm curious as to how much traffic I'll be able to drive to my new page with the magnets that I'm going to have made up to put on my car with the blog address on it. It will be a neat little marketing experiment for me.

I'll keep you posted as to the progress.

Unless, of course, you'd like to honor that 100,000 mile extended warranty that I purchased from you and admit that something is wrong with my car and repair it for me.

Keep me posted as to your decision, OK?

Sincerely,

One Pissed-Off Woman